{"id":3288,"date":"2017-03-19T14:47:00","date_gmt":"2017-03-19T12:47:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/phoenix-em.com\/mariyakoleva\/?p=3288"},"modified":"2017-12-26T22:42:41","modified_gmt":"2017-12-26T20:42:41","slug":"renewals","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/phoenix-em.com\/mariyakoleva\/renewals\/","title":{"rendered":"Renewals"},"content":{"rendered":"

I haven’t written for a long while. I also ha\"renewals-poem\"ve issues when it comes to privacy protection. Most probably, it’s all in my head, but I feel unwell when plenty of people see what I do.<\/span><\/p>\n

I stopped writing for another reason, of course. Privacy issues can be easily resolved when you use pen and paper. I simply stopped writing because I’m not immortal any longer. I lost my edge and the meaning of things I had in store to tell<\/span> readers. My opinions don’t matter to myself even, let alone anybody else.<\/span><\/p>\n

Personally, I was diagnosed with something I’d rather not talk about. My struggle moved to that line.<\/span><\/p>\n

Having said all this, I don’t feel better and I don’t feel safer. Here are two small and rather badly written poems that made me feel I am about to enter poetry once more. After writing<\/span> them, though, I hardly wrote one more. This is not the output I was used to. Therefore, I don’t consider it a come back to writing. I’m really sorry for that. Writing was one of my ways out. My resources are depleting.<\/span><\/p>\n

#01<\/span>
\nThe yellow stones of the facade across<\/span>
\n Belie me of their ancientness,<\/span>
\n Remind me of the cozy books<\/span>
\n and kindly teachers.<\/span><\/p>\n

Behind them – office sternness,<\/span>
\n extroverts ruling,<\/span>
\n competition<\/span>
\n and cold.<\/span><\/p>\n

#02<\/span>
\n Three years after Brutal Minds<\/a><\/span>
\n I get the courage to wake up,<\/span>
\n start the journey back to myself,<\/span>
\n and hope.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a9 soulmary, 2017<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I haven’t written for a long while. I also have issues when it comes to privacy protection. Most probably, it’s all in my head, but I feel unwell when plenty of people see what I do. I stopped writing for another reason, of course. 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